June 1st 1991 baby
ex - Singapore Polytechnic communications student
Strictly Dance Zone

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aight. ive been busy.
joined modern dance on monday cus RYAN HAS COME TO TEACH! wooohooo. but, modern dance trainings are now on monday evenings and sat mornings, and sessions are on thurs. omg~ AND IT GAVE ME BIG BIG BA-LU-KUs(BRUISES) ON BOTH MY KNEES! omt~

i cried today. a little. after hiphop, when i was at dover mrt. why? becus i felt so stressed, so i cried. wowified. gosh. its the first time i got so stressed til i cry.
Let me tell you why:
Mon: sch ended @ 4. Modern Dance training frm 5.30 - 7.15. den 7.15 - 10+ is seniors teach.
Tues: sch ended @ 2 (cus no CD). NDP training 6 - 10.
Today: sch ended @ 3. HipHop training 3.45 - 5+

So now, my schedule is like this:
Mondays: sch end 4pm; Modern Dance 5.30 - 7.15+++
Tuesdays: sch end 2pm/4pm; NDP training 6 - 10+
Wednesdays: sch end 3pm; Hip Hop 3.45 - 5+
Thursdays: sch end 3pm; Modern Dance session, any time, minimum 1hr
Fridays: sch end 4pm
Saturdays: Modern Dance 9 - 12. NDP rehearsal 2.30 - 10.30+
Sundays: Church 12.45 - 4~5

plus all the dance auditions and deadlines for graded assignments,presentations and MST coming up, i cant imagine how im gona cope.

hiphop training was crappy today. D: i think daniel was upset that he came in de studio to see all de Jrs sitting down, only bev, kerrie, randall and me practicing. den we PT, den immd after that, mock test;audition. 1 guy 1 girl go in 1 partition at once n dance the choreo learnt over the last lessons. if im not wrong, many many many ppl failed. me and de guy i went in wid both failed. for the guy is not on de beat, for me, daniel say my movement not nice. den he say we both must practice. same for bev and her 'partner'.
i dont like auditions/interviews. i dun hav confidence. D: even shasha say i looked super scared when i about to go in for the mock test...

training ended v late, at 5.50. bev stayed back cus she gotta go buona vista @ 7.30. i wanted to stay bak to practice by myself too, but not v in de mood.
met kai at yishun for dinner. ranted to him. felt much better. we ate at FC den went to mac to slack. den EMI walked in wid her bf. whahaha. i felt so happy to see her. i miss her ><

Sometimes, i feel so little.
Sometimes, i feel so ugly.
Sometimes, i feel so uncool.
Sometimes, i feel so useless.
Sometimes, i feel like i can't dance at all.
but coincidentally, it all happens when your around.
I feel so shadowed, by you.

So what if... SO what if... SO WHAT? it is only an appearance. isnt it? i feel so disappointed dat ppl always tend to judge a book by its cover. a person who have the best bods or prettiest or angelic faces or biggest and shiniest eyes in de world doesnt mean anything, does it? sometimes, those ppl are jus asses, who have horrible personality and fucked up attitude.

BUT in the end, WHO REALLY CARES?
blehs. i cant help but feel dat its pointless to be a mature;thoughtful;understanding;nice;fun;loving kinda person sometimes. becus in de end, im not pretty. im not attractive. i dont bother dressing up. i dont put makeup. i dont flirt. i wear glasses. im jus the plain jane who prefers being the way i am. i aint someone who tries so hard to be extraordinary and eye-catching. I, am jus me.

I think my room have bed bugs, but i do hope i jus being over-sensitive.

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